tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.comments2023-03-24T12:43:32.932+00:00It's ComplicatedLexie Bellafontehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06163031738486495406noreply@blogger.comBlogger357125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-23342813974608876492014-05-05T03:36:20.169+01:002014-05-05T03:36:20.169+01:00Hi Anonymous. Having depression won't make me ...Hi Anonymous. Having depression won't make me a terrible doctor. If I ever thought that I was so ill I would be a danger to patients I would take time out but on a day to day basis that isn't the case. It's amazing the masks you learn to wear so it won't interfere with communication. It won't interfere with decision making. I still know everything I need to know. It doesn't follow that having depression would mean I would be a bad doctor. Having diabetes or asthma wouldn't lead to me being a bad doctor. If anything having depression would help in practicing medicine because it has meant I am more in tune with myself, and more empathetic towards others because of my experiences. Plus it's given me an insight into what it's like being treated as a patient, and that can go a long way. Lexie Bellafontehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06163031738486495406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-60083222976943065812014-04-24T19:07:51.974+01:002014-04-24T19:07:51.974+01:00Aren't you going to be a horrendous doctor tho...Aren't you going to be a horrendous doctor though? Having not even recovered yet? I agree with the points you make about depression itself, so kudos for that, but I'm quite surprised you're in medicine...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-52335259833373036272014-04-21T06:44:07.070+01:002014-04-21T06:44:07.070+01:00I like the valuable information you provide to you...I like the valuable information you provide to your articles.<br />I'll bookmark your blog and test once more right here regularly.<br />I am rather sure I'll learn many new stuff right here!<br />Best of luck for the next!<br /><br />Feel free to visit my page: <a href="http://Radardetectorspeeder.com" rel="nofollow">laser detectors</a>Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-51222006648646305082013-10-07T21:50:45.160+01:002013-10-07T21:50:45.160+01:00I don't know if you've ever seen Castle bu...I don't know if you've ever seen Castle but I feel like one of those American high school students carrying round a fake egg baby - just one tiny slip and all the happiness is going to crack all over the floor :p<br /><br />Thanks Rosie. I was in quite a bad mood when I wrote that. Ironically when I read "tension headache" I automatically thought "which isn't as bad as a cluster headache", but that's the medic in me :p It means a lot that you have faith in me; I think I just need to find that faith in myself. <br /><br />I know, right?? Thanks for the congrats. I'm so psyched to go :D<br /><br />Hope you're well. Are you in your third year now or have you graduated...I forget... xLexie Bellafontehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06163031738486495406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-6341473300781170712013-10-07T21:46:49.867+01:002013-10-07T21:46:49.867+01:00Hi stranger :) Thank you, as always it means a lot...Hi stranger :) Thank you, as always it means a lot. Great to hear from you as well!! xLexie Bellafontehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06163031738486495406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-31291387585326640552013-10-06T22:35:19.296+01:002013-10-06T22:35:19.296+01:00That feeling of not wanting to jinx fourth year be...That feeling of not wanting to jinx fourth year being good - I am so there with you. Happiness feels very precarious, right?<br /><br />Look, try not to worry about having to know X amount in 12 months time, because on top of everything else you'll just get a massive tension headache, and who wants one of those? You probably know more than you think you do, and a lot can happen in 12 months. Anyway, even if you don't know as much as your friend by that time, does that mean you can't be a successful doctor? NO WAY. Just trust yourself, you will be able to do it, because you want to and because you are amazingly good at getting on with things, from what we all read here :).<br /><br />And Stanford University?! How effing cool is that. Well done!!!!<br /><br />xoRosiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14206672118507672697noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-73975098617993372772013-10-06T22:30:55.284+01:002013-10-06T22:30:55.284+01:00Hey! Despite the fact I'm a lit student I have...Hey! Despite the fact I'm a lit student I have no idea what constitutes a 'good' poem, but I loved this specifically because it felt very natural, like a conversation, and it wasn't structurally forced, it was real--if it's still possible to say that without sounding like a tripped out surf bum.<br /><br />Glad to see you're still writing :).Rosiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14206672118507672697noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-61850855216783801142013-06-03T18:38:16.009+01:002013-06-03T18:38:16.009+01:00Hello :D
Don't know what came over me that da...Hello :D <br />Don't know what came over me that day lol. Normally I'd be way too scared to play Ophelia!<br />Shakespeare's better than Medieval stuff :p Although Chaucer is fun :) Hope you like the class. There's a new Much Ado film by Joss Weaton coming out - looks epic :) <br />Thanks for the suggestions. Aw, I love Lady of Shalott :)<br /><br />xxxLexie Bellafontehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06163031738486495406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-17680694970195364792013-05-24T15:24:25.603+01:002013-05-24T15:24:25.603+01:00I *LOVE* weeks like these! In my case they're ...I *LOVE* weeks like these! In my case they're usually more Angela Carter/fairytale themed, and they don't include multiple trips to the theatre, so I'm a tad jealous.<br /><br />I'm echoing Humaira here, but go you playing Ophelia!! I could never, and I mean NEVER have done that, way too self-conscious, but it sounds really cathartic the way you did it :).<br /><br />Shakespeare isn't my forte (although I've enrolled in a Shakespeare class for next semester, because it was either that or Medieval stuff...) but I remember loving Beatrice's snark and her relationship with Benedick so I'd probably go for being her!<br /><br />Prufrock is such a good poem, but the one that I always go to now is The Lady of Shalott (that fairytale thing again!). I think you can kind of make up your own mind about whether she's in control of her destiny or what's happened to her or what the hell the poem's about. Otherwise it's The Raven, just because it's awesome, and if nothing else the rhythm totally distracts you!<br /><br />HAPPY WRITING :D!!Rosiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14206672118507672697noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-53531394486680349242013-05-19T14:15:15.106+01:002013-05-19T14:15:15.106+01:00Helloo :) Glad you liked it. Go see Hamlet!! It...Helloo :) Glad you liked it. Go see Hamlet!! It's on in Stratford until September :) You can get 16-25 tickets for £5. xLexie Bellafontehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06163031738486495406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-74770541772296759192013-05-19T09:39:06.546+01:002013-05-19T09:39:06.546+01:00I love it :D Stupidly brave of you to have played ...I love it :D Stupidly brave of you to have played Ophelia, I'dve never had the guts for it. And you know way more Shakespeare than I do, I stopped at the tragedies, so I will take your word for it on Viola and Rosalind. Rosalind sounds like an excellent choice for your alter ego protagonist. It's brilliant that you went to see both plays and really felt them too. I want to see Hamlet so badly! <br />And I LOVE the Prufrock poem. Have no better suggestions though :/ Maybe Rosie can help..? lol<br />Glad you posted! Hummushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12160244218294151650noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-26921685877569195132013-05-02T17:51:53.195+01:002013-05-02T17:51:53.195+01:00Good luck! I hope they went ok!Good luck! I hope they went ok!Half a dochttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04860611237759342307noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-32328408322815752022013-03-20T16:50:41.662+00:002013-03-20T16:50:41.662+00:00How can you be sad when other people have it worse...How can you be sad when other people have it worse?<br /><br />makes about as much sense as saying,<br /><br />How can you be happy when others have it better?<br /><br />People just don't understand and that's a pity. xxxAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-30673977477203421152013-03-20T14:17:30.984+00:002013-03-20T14:17:30.984+00:00Lol, that's a good point, suppose from your po...Lol, that's a good point, suppose from your point of view, it's not that big a thing. But it is! Take your victories where you can find them :PHummushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12160244218294151650noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-36716460234586023042013-03-20T13:30:16.351+00:002013-03-20T13:30:16.351+00:00Thanks Humaira. It's weird, loads of people ke...Thanks Humaira. It's weird, loads of people keep saying that, that they admire me for carrying on and coming back up. I don't see it personally but it does mean a lot that people think that. x Lexie Bellafontehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06163031738486495406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-8163809333685472722013-03-20T00:19:56.375+00:002013-03-20T00:19:56.375+00:00Great post :) It's important to know about you...Great post :) It's important to know about you on the good days, puts it into perspective- and I think you expressed it really well. I wanted to say loads about it but Rosie's comment was far better articulated, so I shall just second her. And damn JK's way with words!<br /><br />You're doing great, man :) It's nice to see you come back up every time you've been down (slight understatement), I'm sure it's the hardest thing to do, but you keep managing it, and that's something to be admired. Hummushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12160244218294151650noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-55890749639200597512013-03-20T00:05:44.505+00:002013-03-20T00:05:44.505+00:00I think you're right *sad smile*
Garble away...I think you're right *sad smile* <br /><br />Garble away Rosie, I love your comments :) <br /><br />Hope you're well x Lexie Bellafontehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06163031738486495406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-38935808546551874492013-03-19T23:58:56.141+00:002013-03-19T23:58:56.141+00:00I always loved the way JK described her depression...I always loved the way JK described her depression, because it's a really important distinction to make between that and being sad. I so get this post, and you're right, it doesn't make logical sense, but that doesn't mean it's like...invalidated?<br /><br />Your last post kinda freaked me out - not in a recoiling way, but in an omg compassion way. I think I had a lot of trouble with kind of, accepting that depression isn't a consistent, constant mood, like you said, you don't walk around hating the world and acting like an emo all day. You do laugh, and have a good time, and have many and frequent happy moments, and you are so so grateful (it's almost like feeling so low makes you more grateful, if anything), but I think some people have this perception that if you have the audacity to call yourself "depressed" (weak, to some) then you should act like that all the time, and sometimes I felt guilty if I was caught being happy, and as though people thought, oh, she's better now! It's SO not like that.<br /><br />I think it's just written into some people's nature, and it is always there, and things trigger it off, and you have exaggerated responses to things (in comparison to 'normal' responses). I reckon accepting it as part of you and not necessarily a bad part either (I wouldn't take it back) is a good step in being able to kind of ride the sine graph waves, y'know? And not being apologetic about it, not feeling guilty.<br /><br />At the end of the day, you are your strongest ally, and it's really hard to be in opposition with yourself. Yet again, what a surprise, I don't really know where I'm going with this, but your posts always provoke a response in me, even if it is totally garbled!<br /><br />But I think your saying "It is what it is" sums it up beautifully. Rosiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14206672118507672697noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-65075403951550961532013-03-10T20:25:57.299+00:002013-03-10T20:25:57.299+00:00Hi stranger :DD How are you?? Long time so speak.....Hi stranger :DD How are you?? Long time so speak...type...talk :D<br />Not preachy at all :D And to be honest I'm not sure what I think, or what I was getting at. But you're right, just being is the way forward. <br />And it is shit. Sometimes :p But I was very low when I wrote this. I'm currently floating on a cloud of happy dust so, at the moment, life is ok-ish :D <br />Hope you're ok too. And I know I haven't been around much on here recently but if you ever want to talk drop me an email :D xxx Lexie Bellafontehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06163031738486495406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-47327451119635475192013-03-08T23:29:15.595+00:002013-03-08T23:29:15.595+00:00"He's just hiding behind a veil of prickn..."He's just hiding behind a veil of prickness." Favourite quote of the week.<br /><br />I can really relate to this whole you wanting the guy to know the 'old' you rather than the current version, it's like you're afraid he's not really SEEING you, or the parts you want him most to see. And I understand that desire to delineate past you from current you, because maybe it makes it seem as though you're separated from a lot of bad stuff? OR, if I've totally misread the post, it's not really a desire to have two versions of yourself but because you're so aware of the differences that's how it is in your head? Either way, compartmentalizing like that, I think it can complicate things, because it kind of forces you to constantly analyse and tweak your behaviour to fit with how you want to be...but why not just like, be? I know right, easier said than done, metaphysical can of worms. <br /><br />It's just that, I really really really hope you don't allow this guy to get all symbolically tangled up in your other stuff, because it's so tempting and so easily done, but I've been there, and man does it hurt like a bitch.<br /><br />Also, LIFE IS NOT SHIT. Okay, a noticeable percentage of it is, but lots of it is really wonderful, and you should focus on that :).<br /><br />Didn't mean to write a comment as long as the post! Or one that borders on preachy, but I saw myself two years ago in this, so I had to say something.<br /><br />Here if you need to talk :). Be well xRosiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14206672118507672697noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-19253388709327529132013-01-12T17:48:49.938+00:002013-01-12T17:48:49.938+00:00I love it, you did something entirely for your own...I love it, you did something entirely for your own enjoyment and it worked! No reason that you should give up that part of your life, who knows, you could end up pursuing it in future. If you know what lifts you up, don't hold back on it. Consume books/theatre with all the spare time you get. It's the simple things that get me through- chilled pepsi, old books that I know inside out now, a cup of tea, planning my hypothetical Trip Around the World :P<br />Do you know, I've never actually been to see a play, it's a serious dream of mine. Just one Shakespeare tragedy, seriously! <br />So..never heard of Boris Gudonov..I shall look it up!<br />Anyway, glad to hear you found something that lifted your spirits :)Hummushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12160244218294151650noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-85835937023966287992013-01-12T00:20:00.667+00:002013-01-12T00:20:00.667+00:00Hello stranger :) Like I told Shannon, I don't...Hello stranger :) Like I told Shannon, I don't need wise words. It's more than enough knowing that you're all there. I like your list making, I may do that. Hope you're well xLexie Bellafontehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06163031738486495406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-71807578964650872812013-01-12T00:18:57.687+00:002013-01-12T00:18:57.687+00:00Thanks Shannon. Don't worry, I don't need ...Thanks Shannon. Don't worry, I don't need advice. It's enough knowing people are there :) <br />Lexie Bellafontehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06163031738486495406noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-36668600210853964172013-01-07T22:12:11.424+00:002013-01-07T22:12:11.424+00:00So weird, I was up at the same time from first-day...So weird, I was up at the same time from first-day-back-tomorrowness eating bran flakes. They make things better, but I digress. I agree with Shannon, the first step is the worst, and the second step might just be even more worse than that, but it's all up from there. And nothing is so bad once you're actually doing it, it's the anticipation and the dread that sucks.<br /><br />Sorry I don't have anything wiser to say, but there's a whole lotta people rooting here for ya. When I get stressed like that I make lists of things that are solid in my life that I can count on. Some of them are people, some of them are movies or music or places, and some of them are pizza and Coke.<br /><br />Feel better Lexie!Rosiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14206672118507672697noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8646550256480023962.post-69913525799176020362013-01-07T03:31:24.530+00:002013-01-07T03:31:24.530+00:00:( Been there!! Oh have I been there! I wish I h...:( Been there!! Oh have I been there! I wish I had some good advice, but at least I can say that once you start the new day, it will be over with and then maybe you will feel better knowing it is behind you!♥Shannonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16133913970571235792noreply@blogger.com